Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
