I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm passing your future prison.
two words: eviction party
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
