can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
