I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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