they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
