just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize
