What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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