I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Randomize
