? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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