Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
