i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
