that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
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