and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize