508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
