i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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