How'd it feel making her break her religion?
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
Randomize
