I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
