you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
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