last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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