New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
