I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
