would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
