So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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