I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
