You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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