is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
