i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
