Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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