we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
