i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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