You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
