shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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