I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Dicks are not precious.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
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