btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
