Swine flu. Run for my life!
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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