I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
