There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
