I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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