the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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