woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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