i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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