it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize
