so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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