happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
She needs sedatives and a leash
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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