You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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