I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize