In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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