belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
