I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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