i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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