Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
